
Dear Friends,
Chances are, you know several people among family and friends who face mental health struggles. Maybe right now, it’s you.
If so, you’re in good company, because around 20% of the population is struggling with a mental health issue of some sort, whether it be anxiety, depression, ADHD or other. That’s why Dr. Rob Meeder and I were eager to chat with an expert about how to deal with the impacts of mental health on marriage. Dr. Charity Byers shared invaluable insights in this episode. A few highlights… · If you’re married to an addict: your grace offers your spouse strength to battle the addiction. “Yes, this has hurt me. Yes, you’ve broken my trust, but I am going to walk with you and I’m going to learn how to forgive you.”
· Go the extra mile to help your child feel loved and to help them through their pain of feeling unimportant or unvalued by your partner due to their mental illness.
· Let other people in. Your spouse may say, “Don’t tell anyone. Just keep it a secret.” If it’s a one-time mess-up, then fine. But long term, don’t adopt an unhealthy code of silence that binds you to this very detrimental isolation.
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There was a season when my husband Carey and I struggled with our mental health – simultaneously.
I felt like I was dragging around twice my weight. As if an invisible force opposed my every move. I was subsisting in a world devoid of colour. Internal tears flowed through a bottomless well and at times became visible.
These are a few ways I describe my experience with depression.
I know from our own experience how hard-hitting mental ill health is on a marriage. For the spouse on the other side, it feels like a loss. It seems you’ve lost the person you knew, and to make it worse, you’re not sure if or when they’re coming back.
If this is the season you’re in right now, there are two four letter words I want you to hold onto. You belong to a world whose Creator is LOVE, and there is HOPE.
Hope, wisdom and practical solutions are hallmarks of Dr. Charity Byers’ practice. Tune into our conversation to hear more from her.
Charity also generously shares her advice in a 2 Part article she wrote for my website:
If these aren’t for you, please take a moment NOW to pass them on to someone who could use help today.
Cheering for you to love being home!
Toni Nieuwhof